Single Parenting

OK, so let’s get something straight. By societies definition, I am a single parent. In reality, I am single in the sense of my relationship status but by no means am I single in the parenting duties. I am lucky enough to live with my wonderful mother. She allows me the freedom to work in my chosen profession, with it’s odd hours, by taking on the role of co-parent.

Without my mum I don’t know how I’d manage. She’s done more school drop offs and pick ups than I can remember. She’s transported him to after school activities and doctor’s appointments. She’s been like a live-in nanny. An unpaid, live-in nanny. And technically I’m the live-in because it’s her place.

The problem with being single and a parent and living at home is that it’s very hard to find a decent bloke. I don’t know how other single parents do it. I don’t know where they find a partner, let alone how they hang on to them. Maybe it’s just me. I’ve been told by previous boyfriends that I’m not very good girlfriend material. Maybe it’s true. Maybe I’m not supposed to be in a relationship and should just settle for what I’ve got. Maybe it’s greed but it just doesn’t feel like it’s enough.

There’s a lot to be said for being single. It means not having to compromise on anything. I can choose what parenting style I want to employ. I can choose what sports Bubba plays. I can choose where we go on holidays.

I have always been a single parent. Bubba's biological father has never been in the picture. I hope one day he can have a father who is there for him, especially when he needs a good kick up the backside. Until that happens I am, in a way, both mother and father. I just hope I get the mixture right.

There’s also a lot to be said for having someone to help out with the parenting. With mum taking on those duties, if I get overwhelmed, she’s there to give me a break. If I need advice, she’s there (and sometimes giving it even when I don’t ask for it or want it). But there are some duties that mum can’t take on. And there are some generational problems when it comes to parenting styles that just can't be bridged, no matter how much you love each other.

I guess I’ll just have to keep looking for Mr Right ... any takers?